End of Season Reflections.

This is probably going to be one of the most difficult posts I have ever written. Not because I don't know what to write about: Frankly I could put 5,000-10,000 words down on this easily. However, I don't want to write in a manner that's just venting, I don't want to burn bridges or point fingers, and I don't want to turn this into a "woe is me" piece. The purpose is going to be to make observations of both self and team, and hopefully others can take something from it, whether to use the good for their own situation, avoid the bad, or simply have someone to relate to when dealing with rough situations.

We finished 24-13, which doesn't look bad on paper, but in my mind was a complete failure given our goals. In four spurts, we (in the correct order) went:

16-1

1-10

6-0

1-3

Peaks and Valleys anyone? So what went wrong?

Fingers were pointed everywhere. To an extent, everyone was right. Did the coaches make mistakes? Absolutely. Did we as players make mistakes? We sure did. But because both sides weren't willing to focus on fixing our own mistakes and proceeded to dwell on others, no one was really working to fix it. 

Personally, as a team, I think our biggest issue was as good as we were, we didn't know how good we weren't. We didn't have a definitive leader that everyone felt comfortable following. Even with 3 days left in the season, we were still fiddling with line-ups, looking for the "right one", when the issue was never what 6 people were in what 6 spots, as much as how those people conducted themselves on the court, both in practice as well as in matches. The confidence that helped make us so successful the first half of the season was nowhere to be found the second half... multiple people on the team openly stating that the 16-1 start could have had more to do with the schedule being easy than us actually being good...

The chemistry that was so strong at the beginning of the year disappeared, and quickly at that. Playing time became an issue with most people, and you could tell when it was on player's minds. When the 2nd team went in, the 1st team would goof off on the sidelines and support only in spurts (and I'm being generous). Towards the end of the season, you could hear a pin drop on our sidelines during the game. This is not a shot at anyone specific, just a red flag that things were not as they should have been.

I would say that the coaching staff was forced to bite off more than it can chew - and I don't fault them for that. They were thrown in a VERY unfamiliar situation to them, and we certainly didn't make their job any easier. We knew there was more leash than we probably should have had, and players were pretty open about that fact - yet we still took as much as we were given. Although I would have liked more discipline, shame on us for not disciplining ourselves. We're adults now. We should have been accountable, we weren't (probably still aren't), and this season most likely will always be looked back on as a disappointment.

It will be hard not being able to play next season. I finish my 3-year career with over 1100 kills, 950 digs, 100 aces, various awards... But it all is hollow without the team awards. It saddens me knowing I was one game away from the Final Four and we couldn't pull it through, but I hope that the team learns from this season, works hard in the off-season, and comes with a chip on their shoulder next year, a little stronger, a little smarter, and most importantly a little hungrier. The talent is there. But as we learned this season, it's nothing without the hustle.