Friday, December 26, 2014

Switching Gears - 2 Weeks Until Surgery!

Hello everyone,

I haven't written on this blog for quite some time. It was originally started as a way to give updates to people back at home when I went off to play volleyball in college. After I graduated, I didn't find myself as motivated to write, and basically did one post a year in honor of Coach Dave. Once I started working with high school athletes at Top Flight, I decided it'd be a good way to educate people on various things they'd have to deal with as they began their college search process. I now have my website (Shameless plug - http://progressionvolleyball.com/blog/) to use as an outlet for that. So what's the plan for this page?

Most of my posts for Progression speak as a coach - I plan on keeping this blog up and going back to writing from a personal perspective. 2 weeks from now I'll be having surgery on my shoulder for an extensive SLAP tear. It's going to be a long process both physically and mentally, but the surgeon/friends who have had the surgery have been very optimistic about the chances of a full recovery. There will be good days and there will be bad days, and I plan on writing on both. I'm not quite sure what other athletes may get out of it, but if it helps them with things they're dealing with or gives them something to relate to, perhaps it's worth it.

In a weird sense, I'm really excited for my surgery. To give a little backstory: The Summer of 2013 was a breakout year for me, finishing top-3 in various Open-level tournaments throughout the Midwest. I was battling some back issues towards the end, but pushed through it and did the necessary rehab to get it back in shape that fall. I was playing with a new partner in 2014, and we had secured a sponsorship that would take us all over the country to play in various AVP qualifiers. I had worked the last 9 years for this opportunity, and couldn't wait to see what was in store.

I began experiencing some shoulder pain in December of 2013, but as I had spurts of tendonitis flare up before, I figured it would go away with a little rest. January started well, and my new partner and I won the first Open level tournament against a team who I had lost to about 14 times in a 3-year span. By February, my arm began to get worse and I wasn't able to snap a ball the way I normally did. I was doing PT two to three times a week, but it wasn't getting better. I shot my way through the next two winter tournaments and shut my arm down for the month of March, doctor's orders. After 4 weeks of not so much as down-balling at my team, I began playing again, but the pain was as bad as ever within a week. I was beginning to think I wouldn't be able to play this summer.

I went to get a second opinion from a friend, and immediately I felt an improvement. The only problem was he said it'd take about 8 weeks of rehab to fix the impingement issues I was dealing with, and the first tournament started in 3. He said I could play this summer, but it would be a matter of pain tolerance and I'd have to do the 2 months after the season.

I worked my tail off for 3 weeks, and from May to early June I actually felt pretty good. By late June, my arm started to get weaker - I couldn't snap a cross-court hit from the right side which was a big part of my success. I could still jump serve, but didn't have nearly the velocity and due to the pain, I didn't have the range of motion to fold or slice the way I normally do to mix up the angles I was hitting. On paper, we didn't have a terrible season, but I knew I played poorly for what I was capable.

After the season ended, the pain was starting to get worse. By October, my arm had locked up and I couldn't raise it above my head - simple tasks such as grabbing a glass or putting shoes on became some of the worst pain I've ever experienced. I went in for an MRI and the tear was found.

What's the plan moving forward? I've told people I'm probably done traveling and competing. People have tried to tell me I'll be able to be back, and the support is appreciated - the decision isn't based on if I can as much of do I want to.

The amount of hours I've put into training in the last 10 years is substantial. When I dislocated my pinky, I took 4 days off before starting to play with one hand (Not smart, don't do that). I would guesstimate that I've taken 5-6 different one week breaks in the last decade. Aside from that, I've been on the court anywhere from 3-7 times a week throughout my entire twenties. I enjoyed the grind, but I sacrificed a lot of other things in the process.

This year was by far the most difficult in terms of preparation. I never found a comfortable balance between training as much as needed to stay sharp, while not overworking my arm as it fatigued really easily. I never felt comfortable playing multiple days in a row. Most nights I'd toss and turn because laying on my arm the wrong way would wake me up. Mentally, I'd have to push through those moments at tournaments where my arm would go numb and focus on the things I could control. The travel was fun, the experience was great and I'm thankful/lucky to have had the support I had - but 2014's season, I felt I was playing more to not let my sponsor/partner down than actual enjoyment (and more often than not, while the effort was always there I rarely felt like I gave the performance of which I was capable less than a year before).

Would I like to make another run in 2016 if my body allows? It's hard to tell right now. Luckily I don't need to make that decision. For now, I take it one day at a time and focus on what I'm doing now. Lou Holtz always said, whatever you do, do it to the best of your ability, and I'm working on doing that in other aspects of my life. It's been great getting the business up and running and I'm excited for what the future holds. I've already got some people that I'll be coaching this summer, so I'll still be around the local tournaments. I've been reconnecting with a lot of great people who have always been there for me, yet I've been hard to socialize with due to how I've focused on playing. I thought I'd miss it more than I do. That being said, it's easy to feel that way now: We'll see what happens come sand season.

Hope everyone had a great Christmas - until next time!